Why am I here?

Maybe I should have put this post as my first, but I thought it would be better to talk about the reason why I chose my blog title. Now, you will ask "Why didn't you put it as your second?" And my answer will be "I forgot about it!":). I had a lot in my mind to talk about, insomuch I forgot, but now I remembered about posting the reason why, the answer may be silly to some; But for me it's totally not at all.
As u saw, my English is not quite good, I think I made tens of mistakes in my previous posts. I knew this fact not long time ago, maybe it started by knowing my girlfriend, I saw the big gap between her English and mine. I'm not going to hide it, it bothered me a bit that she is much better than me in English; But that wasn't a reason for me to give up, so I'm trying since then to make it better, and I really can feel the difference. Of course I still need a lot, but I started to go on the right way.
The most thing that bothered me about it was that I was - believe it or not- very good in English one day, that was when I really have the motivation to learn it, but when I came to Ma'sia, I saw how a lot of people can barely speak English. Of course we don't speak English in our country at all, but coming here was the incentive that pushed me to learn it harder. Unluckily, I got this smack on my face instead! So, I lost the interest completely. My inner brain just stopped learning anymore English words; I think my unconscious has made me think "As long as you know words to talk the basic stuff, no need to learn more, no one will understand anyway." And that was the beginning of the end for me in English.
I replaced big and strong words -that obviously no one understands here- with small easy words or even explain it into sentences, so that they will understand. As we all know, English is like most of the things in life "Use or Lose" based. So, I started forgetting my good words, using simple stupid words and insomuch adding the suffixes "lah","mah" and "lor" , in my sentences.

Sorry , I think I went a bit far away from the main title :). Anyway, after seeing her English, I started to get motivated again, started to open the dusty dictionary again, started to get back some of what I lost; And not long time ago, I thought about making a blog so that I can write something in English to strengthen up my English. I hope after a while me and you as well can see the difference in my writings. I'm still faraway from good English, but I'm not ashamed to confess it, actually I'm proud that I have the bravery to say it.
I'm sure If I made this blog some time ago, all of you would be laughing of my primary-school-kid mistakes :). It's not that now I'm not making mistakes, but I'm a bit better, and I have faith that I can move on and on to make my English sub-perfect ;).